Bittersweet
by Dust in the Light-Crisi
Summary: A collection of short, bittersweet Thuke one shots. Mother's Day Special: Thuke celebrates Mother's day in the way only Thuke can: with a strong cup of bad coffee and a side of angst. Shadows: Thalia contemplates Luke's change after meeting his father. The Sting of Failure: Thalia laments about the loss of Luke post TC. Temporary Fix: Luke's her heart's handyman R&R
1. Last First Kiss

**Part of the Inevitability series. The short and bittersweets.**

**Enjoy!**

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><p>It's brief. No lingering or tender caresses. Over and gone in the space of a single suddenly fluttering heartbeat. Completely caught him off guard. Open eyes and open mouth. And it's little more than a touch. A quick tickle. Like a butterfly had landed on his lips only to be sucked away into a gale.<p>

Yet for that single little touch he noticed an awful lot. She tastes like salt and dirt and blood and her lips are chapped and raw. She smells much the same as she tastes but there's a cackle static charge around her like a cloak and sparks literally fly. Her eyes are dewy and red and she's resting much of her weight against him. And she's trembling, from blood loss and fear and exhaustion and maybe even something more.

He never gets a chance to decide if he likes it or not. She pulls away, shoving him backwards so that he clumsily trips over his own two feet. She's gone the next instant, barreling down the hill quick as possible while dragging her shredded leg behind her. Running into death with open arms and spear flashing all the while. He tries to go after her but he's being dragged backward and he's calling her name and Annabeth's joining him and they're both hysterical.

Blood spatters Half-Blood Hill and Luke's screaming his throat into a raw pulp.

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><p><strong>Until next time,<strong>

**~Crisi**


	2. Temporary Fix

**Prompt used was Leaks**.

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><p>He's no plumber. Heck, the few times they've scratched together enough money to stay in a hotel, she became aware that he and the sink don't get along. He just about flooded the room once trying to fix the annoying dripping coming from the faucet. She doubts he's a handyman even by the loosest definition of the word. He always manages to break things even more whenever he tries to fix them.<p>

Well, not always.

He might fail at fixing a leaky pipe, but he's always there corking her tears and bandaging her arms when she gets scuffed up. She gave up a long time ago on mending her own wounds; she's no good at doing stitches and he always insists to see her wound anyways.

She next to never cries…well, except that one time she woke up after having a nightmare about her mother drowning Jason in a river. No questions asked, he just woke up straight away and held her in her arms despite her protests and insisting she was fine.

Luke's a handyman of the heart. He's slowly mending the holes modeling her soul like Swiss cheese. He's filling them in with cemented promises and she's healing.

The problem with entrusting someone else with the fragile task of healing your heart though is that they also become an expert at demolishing their own work, knowing the structural integrity of how your heart works better even than yourself.

The day Luke takes a wrecking ball to her heart, Thalia caves inwards.

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><p><strong>Until Next Time,<strong>

**~Crisi**


	3. The Sting of Failure

**Coincides with** **the ending of The Titan's Curse.**

**Thalia reflects on her loss** **of Luke and the events of the end of the book.**

**Rated T for swearing**

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><p>A piece of her, deep down, thought he was right but then so was she. It was odd. You'd think she wouldn't have time for remorse. For regret. They were moving, running for their damn lives as monsters surged up the mountain and Percy and Annabeth were both still so desperately weak from their ordeal and she had her spear and Aegis leveled at their enemies. But she still felt a crushing in her chest as her heart imploded inwards.<p>

Thalia didn't know what she expected when she'd signed up to go on this quest. A naïve part of her hoped to learn this was all some big misunderstanding…that Luke really hadn't done all the awful things Annabeth said he had. That him poisoning her tree was a mistake. That he really wasn't corrupted at the core. That Percy's dream about him tricking—and in the process almost killing— Annabeth into taking the weight of the sky was fake somehow. Meant to drive a wedge between her and Luke. But she couldn't lie to herself any more. Annabeth had that telltale white in her hair, same as Percy and Luke.

At the very least she'd hoped she could talk Luke out of it. She'd been stupid enough to think that a couple words from her would break Kronos' grip on him… There had been a time when he was her best friend. But he wasn't the same boy anymore. The Luke she knew hadn't stood on that mountain tonight. The Luke she knew would never break his promise and crush her heart into little sticky bits.

And she was angry and hurt and upset and above all she was confused. Confused because she felt…sorry. She felt sorry for Luke and for herself and for Zo_ë_ and for the whole fucking world. And she also hated Luke and herself and Zo_ë_ and the whole fucking world. Did she do the right thing in denying him? What might have been…if she took his hand? Or let her lips find his again? Could she have said something to change his mind?

Yet he had spoken her mind. The words that had been weighing in her heart since she was a child…perhaps he was the one who was right. Or perhaps not…she couldn't think like this. Couldn't stand the weight of Artemis' gaze on her or the smell of Zo_ë_'s blood or the defeated look on Annabeth's face or Percy's fish gaping as he tried to come up with something to say that would solve all their problems. He really did hold himself responsible for far too much…

She wanted to rewind the day. Stop Zoë from getting herself killed on their account and stop Luke from falling off the cliff. More than that, she wanted to say something to Luke. Something…anything, to get back the obnoxious dufus she'd once known and loved.

For a brief moment she fantasizes. Sees him sitting with them on Artemis' chariot, sitting between a weak Annabeth and Percy, letting them both lean on him for support. Protectively cradling Annabeth's head and his thin fingertips running through her blond hair and assuring her everything was going to be okay. Like he used to. Looking Thalia's way and sending a strained smile. Like the old days never ended. But they have. They're enemies now, Thalia reminds herself. And Luke vanishes from her sight, dissolving like the mirage he was. Percy and Annabeth are leaning against one another, their eyes drooping from exhaustion. And it's Percy that sends her the strained smile and Thalia wills herself to soften her glare; after all they've accomplished their objective. They've gotten Annabeth and Artemis back and sealed away Atlas once more, even though Zo_ë_ was fading before them more and more with every moment.

But like Percy, Thalia had had a secret goal in mind. Unlike Percy though, she'd failed.

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><p><strong>More bitter than sweet I'll admit. But last chapter was more sweet than bitter so they even each other out.<strong>

**Until Next Time,**

**~Crisi**


	4. Shadow

**Just a short blurb I've had sitting on my computer for months now. I like it but haven't been sure if it was complete or not. Ended up tacking on a couple words, but I don't think there's anything else I wanted to add to it offhandedly. And it's my experience that when I get that feeling, it's better to just go with my gut and leave it alone.**

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><p>He meets his father and suddenly he's different. Thalia can't pinpoint just what it is exactly that's changed, but it's unnerving. It's not like he changes entirely, it's just a slight change in demeanor. He carries himself a little stiffer, frowns a little deeper, laughs a little forced…like something's stifling the parts of Luke she likes and engorging the parts she dislikes or fears. But still, it's not really that big of a difference. Nothing major really. Not readily apparent. Not a change you would notice in someone if you don't know them as well as Thalia knew Luke.<p>

It always seems to follow him though, unspoken emotions clinging to him but not really aggressive or dangerous. Like a shadow, waxing and waning depending on what time of day it is or where they are. He's not satisfied and he's determined. He's a little more reckless and a little quicker to anger.

She doesn't fully understand just what exchanged between Luke and Hermes, but she's not sure she wants to know. She doesn't want to know what inspired this unsettling change. It's a puzzle. A riddle she doesn't want to see answered. A secret that should stay silent. So she ignores it. Pretends nothing has changed. And he does the same.

Because they're both afraid. Afraid they won't like what they find if they put a name to his emotions. Afraid of what it would mean for them. Afraid to ruin what they have. Afraid of his shadow.

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><p><strong>Tell me what you think.<strong>


	5. Mother's Day Special

**Thuke celebrates Mother's day in the way only Thuke can: with a strong cup of bad coffee and a side of angst. **

**A hastily written tribute to Mother's Day with mild Thuke. Enjoy!**

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><p>This was always a sore day for Thalia.<p>

They're at a backwater diner, stained and forgotten in the middle of Oklahoma. Thalia couldn't tell you the place's name, but they sell coffee cheap and smuggle ambrosia on the side. Luke's trying to cut a deal with one of the attendants while Thalia sips from a dingy mug. She always liked coffee, even this potent, acrid crap. It had a way of sharpening the world around her. An effect she appreciated as a demigod whose life was frequently in peril.

Her eyes keep finding this archaic payphone, out of place in this day and age but not in the time-worn diner. She knows a number. One number. 10 digits. She needn't speak any more words than that either. But actually mustering the courage to do so is next to impossible.

What could she even say? Happy Mother's Day? She didn't know that she cared to wish her mother that. I love you? Thalia scoffs, chipping at the paint on her mug. The words taste fake on her mouth before even speaking them. Maybe they were true; maybe not. But to call her mom…it would be extending forgiveness she didn't feel like the elder woman had earned.

And even more cruelty, it may inspire hope. She hates her mother, but she didn't know if she wanted the other woman to suffer. To get any ideas that Thalia would ever return home. She doesn't admit it even subconsciously, but she cares too much for the elder woman to be so cruel.

Luke slides in to the both across from her, blocking her view of the payphone. He doesn't look any better. He doesn't even smile as he tosses a bag full of ambrosia and nectar her way.

"Your share. Make it last. Shit didn't come cheap." He snatches her coffee cup in return and takes a sip. Cringing, he sets it down in front of her. "Not even a drop of sweet. Really?"

Thalia shrugs. "If you don't like it, don't steal my coffee."

Luke just rolls his eyes. Thalia acknowledges the moot thought for what it is. What's his is hers and what's hers is his. That's kind of the way things have become. Speaking of which…

"What are you doing?"

Luke barely looks up. "Writing something."

Thalia shakes her head. "You're not getting off that easy."

She snatches the item in question from his hands, only giving him enough time to protest with a "hey." But then she freezes, giving him the time he needs to pry the mother's day card from her grip.

"Can't I just have a little privacy?" Luke grumbles, examining the slightly bent edges.

"I thought…that you didn't celebrate mother's day." He didn't last year at least. He hasn't said more than five words about his mom and yet here he got her a card. "She's not…"

"Dead? No, but sometimes its hard to tell the difference." Luke replies bitterly, continuing to scribble on the card. Thalia's curious, but she of all people understands mommy issues. And Luke's expression spells a classic case of some serious parental issues.

After a moment, he digs through his bag and produces a second card and pen. "Here. I thought you might want to send a card too."

Thalia's a little touched by his thoughtfulness, but mostly she's too busy looking at the card like a particularly fat beetle. She's been careful to keep most of herself from Luke. She's certain that she never talked about her mother any more than he's talked about his.

"Come on. I've seen the way you keep glancing at the phone. It might as well be a neon sign. You want to call your mom, but you really don't. You're at an impasse, my dear Thals. Just do something about it before you drive yourself nuts." He insists.

She finally takes the card at his insisting. He smiles slightly, clearly pleased he was correct. She feels a surge of hate and has to stop herself from kicking him under the table. They're trying to play nice. She doesn't need to ruin it.

She doesn't end up writing anything on the card. She hadn't intended to. The moment she saw it, she had no intention. Her mom would know who it came from. The lateness of its arrival would keep her from wondering at where they stood either.

She only writes the address in neat scrawl then seals it in an envelope while Luke does the same. They both plant a stamp in the corner. Thalia wonders briefly what Luke had written in his card; unaware that he wrote little more than she.

They both go to a mailbox and drop their cards in. Because for every sip of alcohol alienating Thalia from her mother. For every night she lay awake, picturing her baby brother and the thousands of different ways her mother might have killed him. For every belligerent slap or night Thalia woke to find her mother with a man she didn't know. For everything her mother was, she raised Thalia. She played a big part in who Thalia became, and for better or worse, Thalia owed her mother for that much. She led into where she was now; she had no doubt without her mother, Thalia would have never met Luke. And that much, she secretly acknowledges, would be a shame.

Much the same is true of Luke. For our parents play a part in who we are. What we make of their actions, and their mistakes, defines us, but it is their hands that do the raw shaping. They outline who we become.

In three days, May Castellan would collect her mail and receive Luke's mother's day wishes. In a rare moment of lucidity, it would bring a smile to her face. She would read that card over and over for years until it was worn. Until her son was passed.

In six days, Thalia's card would return to Oklahoma, marked "No such person at address. Return to sender." No forwarding address was left at the apartment. Thalia would not know it, but her mother's address and number had long since changed.

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><p><strong>For those of you wondering if I'm coming back, most definitely. I've been working tirelessly on writing some stuff, so don't dread having this little tale be the last you hear from me.<strong>

**~Crisi**


	6. In Another World

**Written a long time ago, but finally I decided to share.**

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><p>"Do you ever wonder what else is out there?" Thalia asks softly one night. They're in the middle of a field, cool thick grass poking at his exposed arms and legs. Just laying there, watching the stars and enjoying the summer night's brisk, refreshing air. No mosquitoes, crickets chirping somewhere nearby, and not a cloud in the extremely starry skies. The moon's nearly full tonight and there's a slightly chilly breeze churning the lush grass into waves of black in the night. He can honestly say it's more than welcome after the hot sticky day. He hates humidity and the way his clothes plastered to his skin all day.<br>The fire burnt out a couple hours ago but with her radiating heat right beside him he's plenty warm right now, but not too much. It's pleasant. Not to mention the slight tingle he feels by her closeness and he fights the desire to move in closer. He hasn't voiced what he feels for her yet and he's a little afraid to honestly.  
>"What's that supposed to mean?" He asks with a half-chuckle.<br>She raises a hand out and gestures to the sky. "You know. Other worlds and such. You think there's a planet somewhere like this one?"  
>"Like what? A parallel universe? Or aliens?" Luke can't keep the amusement from his tone. So this is one of those nights where she gets all naïve and philosophical on him. Like a child questioning the world. She watched too many cartoons the other day at that grimy motel they stayed at.<br>"No, I mean just in general. Doesn't even have to be life. Just what do other worlds look like? Do they see the same sky? What do we look like from there?" There's still that meek vulnerability to her voice. She's really looking for his opinion.  
>"Nah, never really thought about it. There's too much here for me to see to be wondering what it's like on Mars." It's also a pointless thought. Neither of them will live to see what it's like on another world, he bitterly realizes. Not only is technology not there yet, but being demigods they probably won't live to see 30. So even if someone somehow manages to invent a space shuttle that can take them personally to a new world, it probably wouldn't be for several years. Long after both are dead and buried. But he doesn't give the thought voice. Too depressing. He doesn't want to ruin the comfort—the closeness—he feels with her now.<br>Instead he just listens to the slightly irritated huff Thalia gives and their conversation cuts off. He keeps expecting some rebuke from her about how close-minded he is coupled with a sarcastic "doofus," but it never comes. Instead he notices her breathing's slower and turns his head to find she's fast asleep, her mouth hanging open a little.  
>There's something different about Thalia when she's asleep. Something softer and younger. He can honestly say she looks more her age when she sleeps. The rest of the time between her make-up, her fierce attitude, and her mature confident mannerisms he forgets just how young she really is. It's the only time he really feels older than her, he realizes. He didn't know when it happened but she's become his equal (or maybe even his superior, who knows?). Possibly because since now whenever they spar he can never beat her. (which secretly both frustrates and impresses him)<br>And yet right now she's just that brash twelve-year-old who he met in a swamp of all places. He's seen her time after time while she sleeps when he's on watch, but it feels different tonight. She's so close to him, her right arm's even brushing against his side. It feels like he's somehow invading her privacy; he's definitely broken the established bubble she's always put between them. And yet…he doesn't want to get up. Besides, he rationalizes, she'll get cold if he leaves her. Yes it's an excuse but you know? He doesn't really care. He wants to move closer, to span the scant couple inches separating them…maybe wrap an arm around her but he can't bring himself to. She wakes up and it's all over for him. She'll kick his ass for sure for breaking their little barrier and he'll be lucky if she ever fully trusts him again.  
>But she looks so damn enticing tonight somehow, her skin glimmering in the moonlight …<br>He looks away, trying to reign himself in before he does something he'll sure as Hades regret. He looks up at the sky and tries to think up something, anything, to distract his mind. Which is how he finds himself wondering, for the first time, exactly what she'd just asked him.  
>What was it like on other worlds? Were things as fucked up there as they were here? He takes a moment and pictures it. A place where they could both be normal kids with normal kinds of problems. Gossip and leafing through college pamphlets to replace drooling creatures and broken bones. A world where he could just be.<br>…he could see why such thoughts appealed so to Thalia.  
>But in such a world, they would have never met. Would have never had use for one another. It's circumstance that holds them together now. Even now, years after they first met. Had Luke met Thalia under different circumstances…had they met under the context of classmates or peers, they would have never talked, Luke realizes. Even now, after having known Thalia for as long as he had, Luke still averted his eyes whenever a pack of gothic or even punk people passed by. And the few times Thalia's been hemmed in and forced to speak with guys that were more Luke's speed…well she never seemed like she could get away from them fast enough. She has railed endlessly about how shallow mainstream kids were, chiding him if he dared poke his head in to an American Eagle. She gets this little crease on her forehead, showing her disapproval.<br>Luke glances at her again. Yes, if she was just an ordinary girl, he would never have given her more than a second glance. It's not that she isn't pretty—she's gorgeous. But stereotypes and clichés are engrained into every kid and he couldn't see himself taking an interest in her. Looks might be superficial, but appearance is what makes a first impression.  
>If they weren't demigods, Luke would have never spoken to her. They wouldn't be allies, friends or anything else. But she would be safe.<br>It's a bittersweet thought.  
>So would he wish that? Would he surrender her? Trade her safety for their relationship? Luke frowns as he realizes he wouldn't. Maybe he's selfish. Maybe he is an asshole and he doesn't deserve her to think that way. But he just…he can't picture doing this without her. He didn't know when it happened, but at some point, he started needing her. He needs her smile, her laugh and just her. That strength that is his weakness and his power.<br>If he was forced to give her up, he would go insane. He knew it intrinsically. Without Thalia, Luke wouldn't be the same person. What would be left behind?

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><p><strong>I may just write a world as Luke sees it in this tale some day...since I love this pairing so much. Of course, without beating a dead horse, I'm sure most of you can piece together why this one belongs under "Bittersweet" instead of any of the other Inevitability titles.<strong>

**TTFN**

**~Crisi**


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